Is God a DJ?

gift...

2008-05-25T21:46:00.008Z

Been writing again, this time as a gift for my God-daughter's baptism. Thought I'd post the lyrics...

Dear child of the Father’s creation
formed in love and held in care,
see your family around you stand
to praise the One who gave,

The gift of a child,
offered now in love;
May you know the One who gave,
May you know the One who gave His life,
May you know the One who gave His life for you,
child, for you.

We thank God for life-giving water,
today, the symbol of grace;
and we pray you grow to know His love,
and to praise the One who gave...

Gb,
R x

not singing...

2008-05-12T13:20:00.003Z

I'm stuck! I find that there are loads of people having a whine about singing in corporate worship gatherings, but I've still yet to find a solid reason why we should NOT sing at all in said gatherings! Interestingly, I've not found anything in any book about whether or not to sing, all I have found is the usual stream of comments about the choices we make in our music, hymns vs. song etc.

So...if you have a good reason why we should NOT sing at all please tell me! I don't want to hear about the types of song that we sing congregationally, that's a matter of personal taste and can be dealt with through a better choice of material.

I want to hear about those who think that it's a culturally irrelevant thing to do...and why you think that. My bias is so ingrained that I'm finding it difficult to work out why people would want to abandon this practice.

I promise I won't go on the attack...I just want to hear the other side of the argument!

Gb,
R x

a reassurance of calling...

2008-03-25T09:48:00.003Z

Having spent the past week working with a large church in Harpenden, I have, again, though more than ever, recognised my calling into the ministry. It's been such a fabulous week, with some of the most wonderful people I have ever met! I realise that working in a church may not always be this rose tinted, and it wasn't all so...but God has shown me that there are churches who want to deepen and expand their faith and understanding who are already in the church. As much as I recognise the Christian call to evangelism in every respect, I have always known that I am called into discipling and pastoring primarily. I thank God that I have been able to experience the joy of this, especially over such a precious time of the Christian calendar.

Praise be to God and His resurrected Son.

Gb,
R x

Singing & Marmite

2008-02-28T12:55:00.003Z

I've just offered the title of my next research seminar for next month and titled it..."Congregational singing and marmite, you either love it or hate it: Anthropology, sociology and spirituality".

So, is congregational singing like marmite? Do we have polar opinions on this practise? Or, do some of us not really care either way? I'd love some opinions!

I'm just reviewing Steven Mithen's "The Singing Neanderthals". It's an excellent text on the development of music and language from an evolutionary, archaeological and anthropological perspective. Very interesting, and offers some lovely insights into the way our brain works with regard to these two topics. It also offers some intrigue as to the congregational nature of our music-making. Maybe I'll write a little more about that sometime in the future!

Gb,
R x

Holocaust Memorial

2008-01-29T22:38:00.000Z

I have to make a quick comment on this, simply as it was so profound.

This evening we had a Holocaust Memorial Day Commemoration, led by the Centre for Jewish Christian Relations, and some other Federation students. It was a lovely 'service', with a great sensitivity to the occasion without being pointedly over emotional. My dear friend Petra, a Christian from Berlin read the 22nd Psalm, not in English nor German, but in Hebrew. (She is somewhat of a linguistic whizz!) The simplicity of this statement I found to be strikingly profound, not because I identify the atrocities of WW2 with the German people as a whole, but knowing the stigma that the few have left on the identity of a nation. Maybe I have over-egged the pudding somewhat here, but this moved me.

Gb,
R x

New year, new me?

2008-01-11T16:06:00.000Z

Quick answer...no! I've always been rubbish at keeping resolutions so, this year, I didn't make one, it's a daunting enough year ahead, with my entire thesis first draft to be handed in by this time next year! Despite the threat of work, I have some exciting singing prospects in the pipeline, more about those when they are confirmed.

I must confess that life hasn't been the greatest over the last few weeks. The stresses and strains of mixing research and training have taken their toll, and luckily my body has been my warning system (though excess heartbeats are a rather scary way of your body telling you you're stressed!!). So I wonder how this relates to God and me?

I've just started a term with a prayer guide. Nothing highly spiritual about it really, rather just someone to meet up with to chat about my prayer life, keeps me on my toes if nothing else! Most times when I pray during my services, especially when all ages are present, I reiterate the importance of a healthy prayer life and how it is all about relationship. I've always said something like this...
"The best friends we have are those we talk to, imagine having a
friend that you never spoke to."
I think that we too often forget that the presence of the living Christ is with us always, I know I certainly do. Sat in my room in the chair I sit in solely to read my Bible and pray, that very verse came to me, as I looked up, I saw it printed on the sheet given to me by my prayer guide:

If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will give life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit that dwells in you. Romans 8:11

It's hard to comprehend of course, but as that very same spirit that raised Christ from the depths of hell dwells in me... who am I to fear. I watched Bruce Almighty again today, I love it, and I don't care what people may say about it theologically. It spoke to me of that omniscient, omnipresent God that I forget so often.

Hmm...enough ramblings,

Gb,
R x

old gifts... new song

2007-12-12T23:19:00.000Z

I think that this year has brought me closer into understanding Advent than any year previous. I wonder if that's partly because I've had to 'do' Christmas that much earlier this year. Even before the 1st December I'd been to an Advent service and Christmas meal, and a carol service (the joys of the Cambridge short terms)!I think I'll write a little more about the character that I've been focussed most on after I've preached about her on the 23rd (someone remind me I've said this!).

But I have discovered something else this last week. I had 2 conversations, with 2 completely different people on 2 different days, but both prompted me to remember that I am, singer and performer, and a passionate one at that. A while back I feared, and I guess accepted that my music was likely to be put on the back burner as I pursued my ministry in other areas, but having had these conversations, I knew that I had to do something about the fact that I so sorely miss this part of who I am. Having thought on this, I had the dreaded realisation that no longer did I want to sing other people's songs, not that I don't love them or respect them, but rather that they are already sung, and it was a new song that I needed to sing.

So...with a great deal of nervous prayer, yet sure of the Spirit's motivation in me, I sat down to write. I have never had a great deal of confidence in my songwriting abilities - mainly as all previous attempts have been...well...crap! However, I think now there is something different, and although I recognise that I am no songsmith, and this is hardly out of the ordinary, this is mine, and...well...I'll let you be the judges!

1. Take me to Your heart, and let me see what is within

Show me what it is to live Your love

Walk me through the dreams You have for this world and the next

Let me see who we were made to be

Chorus:

Show me love, show me grace

That I might be Your prophet in this place

Take my hand, let me walk with You

Lead me, Father, use me, Lord

2. Take me to the place, where Your heart was sacrificed

Show me what it meant to give Your child

Walk me down the path He walked, the path of my salvation

Let me see perfection's life in me

3. Take me to the people that call out with life's despair

Show me what it is to call them friend

Walk me down their streets and give a humble heart, O Lord

Let me see Your Kingdom come through me

Bridge:

Help me offer Heaven's door

Let me offer Heaven's open door

Gb,

R x

Learning to love liturgy...!

2007-11-19T22:35:00.000Z

There are some things in life that you know you will dislike forever, and no matter how many times you try them out you still dislike them...like mushrooms for example. Set liturgy is not one of those things. I thought it was, I thought I would never like the parroting of creeds and prayers on a regular basis, and being the charismatic that I believed myself to be, thought that there were better ways to engage in liturgical practices (remembering here that liturgy means 'of the people' - I fear that it's a misused and therefore misunderstood word much of the time). Having been, for me, well and truly steeped in set liturgy for the past 7 weeks, I'm starting to come to terms...no...that would do a disservice, I'm starting to understand the sense of repeated text seeping into your soul. Taize music has aways worked on this concept, a short repeated simple truth that can work it's way into your soul, with each repetition, the truth having new, deeper meaning.

I think one of Martyn Atkins' most favourite stories (I'm only judging this on the amount of times I heard it over my 3 years at Cliff - sorry Martyn!) was that of Terry Waite's return to the UK after his captivity. He was asked by reporters what means did he use to survive his time, and the answer came, unsurprisingly unreported, that his survival was due to the Daily Office (Anglican daily prayer) that he knew by heart.

When truths are so deeply infused into our being they become our language. As with Charles Wesley; he was so saturated in the Bible that the scriptures poured out onto the page and became the language he used to write. I don't intend to become completely sold out to set liturgy, but I think a healthy love for it is fine for now. ;)

Gb,
R x

Inherited Church vs. Inherited Faith

2007-11-04T11:56:00.000Z

I'm on attachment (not as painful as it sounds...merely a long term placement) with the lovely and wonderful Maggi Dawn at Robinson College for the whole of this academic year, and its making me think a great deal. Not only because you can't not when you're around Maggi...but also because I'm simply being challenged by the completely different culture, both in terms of the church/chapel culture, and also the social culture that surrounds it being within a university college.

This morning in chapel communion, we celebrated that it was All Saints. It struck me that Saints are not something we really 'do' in the Methodist tradition, ironic as we seem to love our anniversaries! Maggi spoke of the history of our faith that we have inherited through such people as those recognised through canonisation, those whose Christian life and service made such an impact on humanity that they are worthy of remembrance. It certainly seems that we inherit a great history (though some of it, admittedly rather shameful when we consider the Crusades) of faith.

This in turn struck a chord of a recent conversation I had with a friend about what 'emerging church' was, part of her answer being related to 'inherited church', and a wish to break free from that. So the question that crept into and wriggled around in my head this morning was... can we, and if so, how do we separate inherited church and inherited faith?

Disposing of the inherited church parts of our religion, although not easy, seems to have its realistic possibility; however, how can we dispose of the tradition of faith, which surely goes to make up the Christian religion. Is the emerging church trying to remove all traces of the imposed 'cultic' elements of Christianity? Maybe, and most likely, I need to read more about the emerging church. But I wonder what the elements are that are considered to be vital; who decides? Does history mean nothing?

Defining 'emerging church' is, I believe by its own admission, somewhat of a paradox, and one which is as changeable as the author of it. But what of the saints; the moulders, sustainers, movers and shakers of our faith: To what extent should this inheritance be elemental in what we are as Christians?

Gb,
R x

2007-10-11T21:42:00.000Z

A promise is a promise!

Well, I did promise that I would blog once I was settled into Cambridge life, and that I am now...so...how is it? I hear you all ask!

Before arriving I swore I would never become the owner of a bicycle. Before I arrived I thought I would find myself in the pub most nights. Before I arrived I thought that Cambridge couldn't be that intimidating a place. Before I arrived I felt that I might be slightly different from other people...before I arrived...!

I now have a lovely purple bike for which I intend on buying a basket, preferably wicker. I've been to the pub a total of 4 times in 3 weeks (although my slightly concerned parents might be glad at this statistic, those who know me from other institutions might gather that this has a sense of slight concern!). I have never felt so daunted by the intelligence of other people before and that I might not have anything to offer a conversation, or that I might make a faux pas at any turn. I am now part of such a varied community that difference in any manner is normal.

The point of these observations? God sending me here was no accident. I thought I would be academically challenged, but never thought that I would find every fibre of my being tweaked and tested as I anticipate it will be here. Already, I have been faced with a worship style that is so undeniably contrasting to everything I have previously known. I have come to deal with the loneliness of my work here, that I sit at my desk most days, barely speaking to another soul, except the daily call from mum, and my neighbour popping in to fill me in about something or other. I thought, before I came that I could probably just get on with leading a church. I have enough common sense, enough experience, enough passion to do it. Now, I know that God sending me here for 3 more years will be just enough time for me to be broken and remade yet again. For isn't this exactly what the Father wants for us? To be broken and remade day after day. To realise that we didn't get through yesterday without Him, what makes us think we can get through today? To know that today, we will make a hash of things, but through the sacrifice of Christ we can start again tomorrow.

As much as I love Cambridge, and Wesley House, I know that the next three years are going to be a challenge for me. For those who are close to me, and anyone else who's feeling generous, please keep me in you prayers, and come visit sometime!

As for research - it's all going pretty interestingly at the moment. That's for next time though!

Gb,
R x

2007-09-15T17:33:00.000Z

I know I know...I'm terrible! I'll blog fully when I'm installed at Cambridge! I promise!!

R xx

2007-08-01T23:42:00.000Z

Shouldn't we be singing psalms?

It's about time I wrote more about my research rather than just general musings!

So, the Psalms. Three important things to note about the Psalms: (if you disagree, please let me know...these are things I've taken a little for granted, but are backed up with some reading!)

1. The Psalms are musical by nature. They are not simply unstructured emotional splurges onto a page, but rather carefully crafted compositions of everything from the most ecstatic joy, to the deepest grief.

2. The Psalms are as much corporate as they are individual.

3. Biblical Psalms were written as models rather than prescriptive dictations for liturgy.

With these three in mind, it's interesting how we treat the use of the Psalms in contemporary worship. From my experience, the Psalms are generally used no differently to the rest of scripture in our corporate acts of worship. On an odd occasion, they are used as a call to worship, on a rare occasion, they are used responsively (as in the back of the Methodist Hymns and Psalms book), or for the lucky few psalms, have made it as hymns and therefore incorporated that way.

Even in the New Testament we're commended to sing psalms to each other, let alone the extensive practices of this in the Old Testament! So...should we sing these psalms? Should we write our own? Or can we simply treat them just as part of scripture. Is our treatment of the Psalms biblical??

Gb,
R x

2007-06-23T13:51:00.000Z

Writing writing writing...

The problem with long term research, is that sometimes I want to write about something else for a change! You're head gets so stuck in academic writing that, sometimes you just want to write about nothing, or something...just not, how the Old Testament treats the use of singing!

So, what shall I write about...I think I shall write about friendships. I consider my friendships unusual, when I try and compare them to everyone else's that is. But maybe, just maybe, I have misjudged what friendships are all about. I always assumed that your best friend was someone who would drop everything for you, the person who would always choose you over somebody or something else. That's what I used to think anyway, I guess because it never happened to me.

So I wonder, what does friendship mean to me? I have no 'best' friend, but I am blessed to have a heck of a lot of people that I care deeply about, and I'm pretty sure care deeply about me. I have old friends (I mean in terms of longevity, rather than age!), I have close friends (those who who know me better than sometimes I would like), and I have the one or two friends who I know I can tell anything to, without fear of judgment or that they 'may get the wrong impression of me'.

I guess I always thought that time spent with others rather than me, meant that they cared less for me. It's a horribly selfish thought really, I guess I've always just wanted to be at the centre of someone's attention, and yeah...I'll beat myself up for admitting that, but, one of those wonderful friends (I'm pretty sure you'll know who you are) taught me recently, friendship is like love...we don't have a quota for the day and when it's used up it's used up. So, my dear friends who read here, please don't ever think that if I haven't called you, or text you, or otherwise, that I care any less for you. Or if I cut you off (and yes...Moo I do mean you here!) because I have to go do something else it's because I want to get away from you. I am a fierce defender of my friends and friendships, and I pray that is something that will never change.

I wonder if the disciples ever felt like this? I mean, Jesus...the guy...the main man...everyone wants to be His best buddy, surely? He spends more time with some of the disciples, maybe He loves them more. He takes Peter off on his own to chat with him, He has to be the favourite, surely? I think I identify with Thomas. I think that maybe, Thomas felt like it was always the other guys who Jesus was closer to. I think that when Thomas doubts that Jesus is alive, it is more a case of, 'it's not fair...how come they got to see Him and I didn't?' And so stubbornness kicks in, 'I want to see it for myself.' I think that Thomas maybe wanted something of Jesus to hold to himself, something that was precious to just Him and Jesus. But the nature of Jesus...being God and all...doesn't chastise Thomas for that, but the God of intimacy, the God who wants each and every member of this human race to have a one-to-one relationship with Him, reaches out His hands to Thomas and says...'see, feel and believe'.

I thank God that He is the God of the personal and not the impersonal; the God of hand-holding, not safety reins; the God who understands our jealousies and speaks to them.

Gb
R x

2007-06-08T18:18:00.000Z

I don't want to start again...

As I near the end of my time at Cliff, my mind wanders off to one of my favourite films...Shawshank Redemption. I am reminded of the cons talking out on the yard about Brooks, an aged prisoner, being released after 50 years inside.

Red:These walls are funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That's institutionalized.
Heywood: Shit. I could never get like that.
Prisoner: Oh yeah? Say that when you been here as long as Brooks has.
Red: Goddamn right. They send you here for life, and that's exactly what they take. The part that counts, anyway.

Now, don't get me wrong, I am not trying to imply that Cliff College has been in anyway like a prison to me, in fact, in my Christian walk, it has encouraged me into the greatest freedom. But I do fear that I am an institutionalized creature. In some ways, I don't want to lose all that I have gained from here, my passion, my learning and so on. In other ways, I worry that I will compare Cambridge to here.

Really, my greatest fear is what this all means. I have spent 3 years becoming a part of the furniture here, just as I spent 3 years trying to do that in my first degree at Huddersfield, over 3 years in teaching, and yet again, I must start again. New life, new part of the country (living so far south terrifies me...I don't want to lose my accent!!!), new friends, new course. I worry how I will fit in. I worry, will I find the strong friendships I have done here, will I keep in touch with those here, will they keep in touch with me?! I worry, will I be a token singleton. I worry, have I listened correctly to God...is this really what He wants?

So I fall on the the words of Jesus...always a good place to fall.

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matt 6:33-4

I know my destination, even if the way is a little uncertain. I'll just keep following my Shepherd.

Gb
R x

2007-05-14T22:14:00.000Z

2 months have passed....
Sorry! It's been a manic time with only a little research getting done, but at least I'm feeling a little more on the way with it all!

Part of my extra busyness has been due to a last minute call to go and do a workshop for the Heart of Worship Conference organsied by the Methodist Church in Llandudno last weekend. Wonderful thinks I...until I realise that it's the morning after a best friend's hen party in Liverpool! So my story is probably more about that than the conference and what a blessed time that was!

This friend is an old housemate from a time when I would drink and party a fair bit! She is not by any means a shy girl, and neither are many of her other friends. So...the party games ensued. This first of which was to tie a pink balloon round our wrists with a warning...do not remove! Sat down after a late afternoon meal, one of the Hen's balloons is popped...revealing it's contents....a dare, which she promptly completed. So...one by one we pop our balloons and do the dare...or solemnly swear to do later that night. The dares get more and more daring...some verging on the obscene, so I begin to pray! Please God..help! I don't want to compromise my Christian witness by either doing something inappropriate, or by refusing to join in and be a party pooper! Ruth! I hear their cry....it's your turn! I duly sit on my balloon and pull out the dare. I read and laugh..."Sing the chorus to 'I will survive'." Well...my gratitude and praises must have been heard right across heaven!

See...God doesn't call us to be nowhere near the grimy and sometimes slimy world...He calls us right into it, but at the same time, He calls us to not be a part of it...and clearly He rescues those who call on His name! What a faithful God have I?! Fantastic!

R x

2007-03-28T21:47:00.000Z

Singing Communities

So...having given my research seminar last Friday the latest statement i would like to propose is...every Christian community should congregationally sing. This doesn't mean therefore that every time Christians meet together they should sing, but rather that every Christian should be part of a community that has congregational singing as a key part of its worship time.

Not going to go and give away all my research, but this is what I'm hoping to argue! Let me know what you think!

Gb,
R xx

2007-03-19T23:58:00.000Z

To sing or not to sing...Is that the question?

Thanks guys for all your comments, i've been reading and thinking a great deal about this whole masculinity thing, and many male friends have come to the same conclusion as me, that it is a sociological issue! As we associate worship with emotion, and men (on the whole...please forgive the stereotype in order to make my sweeping statement!) do not like to air their emotions in public!

So, where does that leave singing? I know many a seriously blokey bloke who find music and singing an entirely integral part of their worship, and have little or no issue, yet there are some who cannot entertain the thought! My apologies if this sounds like i am having a go men...i really am not, but what is the issue? That singing is seen as feminine and emotional, or that you really just don't like to sing?! Would you sing on the terraces?? What makes it any different to singing in church? I'd say that footie chants are as fervently emotional as worship songs may be. Is it because you can't be heard on the terraces? A group of people will learn a new song more quickly in a loud environment where the individual voice can't be heard and therefore mistakes are less embarrassing, rather than in a small group where mistakes are easily identified??? Does this mean that all worship music should be loud!?!!?

Changing tack a little, I'm hoping to base much of my work on a theology of music in worship on a very biblical foundation by Kleinig drawn from Chronicles, but i'll blog a little more in a while about that!

If anyone knows of any emerging communities who have developed a reasoned theology for their own use of congregational singing in worship i'd love to hear, as so far i've come across little substantial reasoning as to why singing has been thrown out apart from..."because we didn't like it".

Hmm...that turned into a minor rant! Sorry folks...will try and be a little more positive next time! And..ladies...what do you think about singing in worship?? Don't let this all be about blokes! lol!

Gb,
R x

2007-02-02T18:48:00.000Z

All change!

Has it really been that long?! For those who check my blog when they're bored (I cannot think of another earthly reason for reading it otherwise!) I apologise for a month of nothing new! But...here it is...all new!

So, my research has kinda shifted direction a little. I decided that there was already plenty of people who had looked into the purposes of music, and why it has been so important to worship. So...having had this debate a couple of times in the pub, and realising that it was a viable tangent to vere off on, i've decided to move to look at music in the emerging church...ie...Is music necessary in worship?

So, i'd love any comments, observations or similar on this topic! Many emerging church contexts have abandoned the use, in particular, of congregational singing, the use of hymns or 'worship songs' is highly limited, as both the practice of singing and the use of this genre specific music is 'culturally irrelevant'. But, as history has shown, and Methodist hymnody has coined...'God's people have always been singing.' So are we missing out on something key by not singing in worship?

Have a think and let me know!

R x

2006-12-26T11:55:00.000Z

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Yeh...so i realise that i post this on Boxing Day, but hey...the thought was there! I'm discovering that Christmas is starting to lose its appeal slightly. Although i had a moderately pleasant day yesterday, it was spent with my parents and my Grandad mainly cooking, eating, washing up and watching tv! Ah for the days of kiddy excitement (i guess this is what comes of gettin into your late 20's and having no family of your own to keep entertained!...awwww...poor, single Ruth i hear you cry...bring on the sympathy vote!!)

But what of the meaning of Christmas for me?? It's gotta be about promises. Jesus is a God promise - kept. A promise of salvation, of presence, of guidance...of all those things and more, revealed in the humility of a baby. I love it! I love the being almost forced into being sociable with people, an excuse to party hard, to make contact with those forgotten for the rest of the year!

Anyway...still on a plan to have shorter entries! So...Merry Christmas and a blessed New Year!

R xx

2006-12-18T23:00:00.000Z

better blogger!

i've decided that not only do i need to increase my blogging frequency, but also i need to decrease the content! for those of you that don't know me personally, you've probably already gathered that i can talk for England! so...a quick blog...lets see if i can manage it!

carols at Christmas...why is it that we love singing them? Is it a reminiscence of childhood thing? Why, when non-churchgoing friends of mine went to a packed carol service, and my minister addressed the hoards saying "i hope you're all here for more than a good sing" they told me after that, well actually they were, and have never returned since?

and after all, what exactly does 'late in time behold him come' mean!?!? there you go...a random...and relatively short ponder for you!

R x

2006-12-04T21:45:00.000Z

Music and Creation...
Don't you just love it when God just gives you great things for no real reason!?! Well...i'm just gettin all excited about my research at the moment, and it's just great! So thought I'd share a little!

Last week I hit a bit of a brick wall, asking all the typical researchers questions...like why on earth am I doing this to myself, is this really what God wants me to be doin, will it ever be over...and most importantly...am I really furthering the Kingdom of God by doin what I am?? Well i'm not sure I answered any of the questions, but my most recent reading has really given me a buzz about my writing, so have kinda forgotten those worries and now have regained a passion to want to answer my question...why is music so important to God?!

The text in question is a small 20 page booklet by Jeremy Begbie called Music in God's Purposes. This has been and I think will continue to be a great source of raw questioning for me over the next few years. Not so succinctly has anyone else addressed the issues of musicianship and Christian music in a way that I completely identify with! He asks the questions that I am asking (luckily without fully answering them either...so it leave me a little room to work!).

He writes: ‘In general, a glance at church history confirms that music has usually been seen as a vital component in worship. Is it not worth asking why this is so, and just how it is that music can glorify God?’ This is precisely the question I want to answer!

So how do I react to this? Well, Begbie has revealed a great truth that I guess I already knew. Music is about engaging with God's creation, it's about how we relate to God, the world and each other: it's about community. We well know, as was Calvin's concern about the manipulative ability of music. As with all things, this power in the wrong hands is a dangerous thing (without meaning to sound too much like a certain Tolkien novel!), but the raw beauty of music can be liberating, healing, exhilarating, it can bring us to an unspoken experience of God, and we can do the most high priestly of all things, it can bring great glory to God. Not only of course through 'Christian' music, but all music that is not clearly against God may be used to glorify him. (ooo...I may be hearing some fellow students cry...if it's black and white, it's art not porn! Maybe we could have the same debate with regards to music!)

However...yet again I fear that I've not talked about what I said I would the last time I blogged! I can't even remember what that was! Ah well...this feels very unfinished but as I need my bed I'm going to leave things on a very unanswered knife edge!
God bless you all

R x

2006-10-19T07:36:00.000Z

I'm back!
Apologies to those who have been awaiting some more deep insights from my world (they are clearly few and far between!!) I had anticipated posting at least once a week...but realise it's been a good month or so now! However, I am back!

So...what to muse upon today!?! My reading has really been taking me everywhere, from Greek philosophy where I learned that Pythagoreans believed that Pythagoras could hear the "music" emitted from other planets to Scottish composer James MacMillan regarding music as sacrament. I've also been looking at a biblical foundation for my work.

Apart from the realisation that I need to be able to read some Hebrew (I'm discovering that this isn't the easiest thing in the world!) I've been interested in looking up the words for song and singing in the Old Testament and understanding the broad concepts of these Hebraic words that are so often just translated as 'song' or 'sing'. This has become in some ways a bit of a disappointing task unfortunately, due to a few realisations.

Firstly, that even something we might call a song may not incorporate any music! It seems that 'song' can equate to 'poem' too, which may not be a surprise to some, but has meant that there must be some care in assuming that song equates music.

Secondly, as it turns out, a word often translated as 'sing' in particular in KJV actually just means to raise a great noise, or to shout. I'm yet to decide whether or not this has a great impact on the importance of singing in the Old Testament though! There are still plenty of occurences specifically of singing. I'm hoping that there will also be some good merit in looking into the employment of the Levites by King David to be tabernacle musicians in Chronicles.

I find it wonderful that there were a group of people who seemed to be set apart for the musical worship of Yahweh. Not only were this group musicians, but they were the best musicians. Chronicles records not that Keneniah is appointed because of his connections, but rather...Kenaniah the head Levite was in charge of the singing; that was his responsibility because he was skillful at it. Surely there is a lesson in that for us! But I think I may have previously broached this argument! But, this does point me to the centrality not only of music, but of singing in our worship.

One of my main concerns is that congregationally sung worship seems to be disappearing from new expressions of church. Fresh expressions/emerging church whatever you wish to call it, seems to be scared of congregational singing as they see it as alien to culture. As much as I recognise the point and issue with this, I can't escape from the fact that sung worship is clearly Biblical, and not just in the Old Testament! Colossians 3:16 admonishes us, as with several times in the New Testament, to sing hymns of praise to God. The disciples sang, the creatures of heaven sing...and so should we!

God doesn't care whether we can or cannot sing...those are the restrictions that the world has put on music, not God! Honestly...I don't believe God has a tuning system!

Anyway...I hope that makes up for the recent silence! I realise I've dropped a possible bombshell with the last statement...as always...i'll suggest that this may be a topic for another entry (that i'll probably forget about!!)

Blessings
R x

2006-09-16T23:13:00.000Z

Why music?

Now i'm not asking why, theologically we make music in a general sense, as that may be simply explained by the fact that we are made in the image of God, and because He is creative, therefore we are too. Music is a creative gift given to us by our creative Father. So the first question I'm asking really is, why music in particular? Why is music so important to God, why has it been so integral to the worship of God's people, seemingly from the beginning of time? The first mention of music in scripture is in Genesis 4:21 where there is mention of Jubal, 'the father of all who play the flute and harp'. And then, in Genesis 15 we read the first song, that of the Moses and the freed Israelites. They sing their praises to God, recounting His faithfulness to them in their escape from Egypt.

The Psalms tell us repeatedly, (5 times in 5 different psalms) to sing a new song to God, even Isaiah picks up this phrase about singing a new song. Now, although dancing is described and maybe even encouraged, there is no other creative gift that we are told to use in such abundance as making music. Music is used in so many different ways throughout the Bible; to praise God, to soothe Saul, there was music as the Lord spoke to Elisha...and loads more that I can't even think on at the moment! So why is it that music has accompanied God's people, God's work? Why is it that we have concentrated on music as opposed to art or another creative gift? Is it just better than having silence maybe?

Maybe is it simply that we sing God's praises as something that is communally creative? Is there a freedom in that sense, that singing is simply that creative thing that we can all join in with, as opposed to just watching, or feeling inadequate to join in anything else. After all we can get lost in a crowd of singing, in theory it's something we can all do, whether we claim it's in tune or not! But is there something more divine about the use of music? Is there something more to music than meets the ear???

Hmm....think that's going to be my next entry! Is there more to music than meets the ear?!? Let me know what you think!

R x

2006-08-30T21:33:00.000Z

Starting to come together!

So, i've started to get some ideas together for my research at last! Am still quite scared that I'm not intelligent enough to undertake research, but...with God's help etc etc!

The vague chapter topics (at the moment) are something along these lines!

Music in nature (music of the spheres / Shakespeare)
Music as communication – works both ways
God’s music – biblical, creator / composer God
Man’s music, faithful performer / faithful interpreter (music and sex - don't sing about God anymore, so sing about sex - replacing one ecstasy experience with another????)
Universality of music - why is it that music is always linked to spirituality, around the world?

These may not make a lot of sense at the moment, I'm not sure that I even know what they mean, but I intend to find out!! I had a long debate with Pete (supervisor) yesterday about whether God sings! The only biblical reference we could find was Zeph 3:17..."He will rejoice over you with singing". However, on closer inspection, the Hebrew doesn't necessarily translate as singing, ah well! So if anyone has any ideas about the concept of God singing, or even making music, please let me know! At the moment, the sentence I'm clinging to, to prove or disprove is...
"If God created music is He merely the composer – we are the performers/interpreters – therefore we are the distorters or faithful conveyers of the message?"
It seems that God has created the ability for His creation to sing, or make music, and therefore, all creative ability stems from Him, therefore, is it justifiable to claim just this, that God is the composer, and that anything we 'compose' is merely an interpreter of that which He has already written!?!?

Hazy I know, please let me know what you think guys, and if you know any Christian musicians, especially writers / composers, please send them a link to this, I'd love to hear their opinion on this!

R x

2006-08-20T21:56:00.000Z

SOME PREACHERS SHOULD READ THEIR BIBLES!

Romans 12:2 - Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world...

I went to my first Soul Survivor a couple of weeks ago, and I've got to say, it was amazing. It's such a blessing to be in the middle of a crowd of 10,500 young people (I did feel a little old!) who are all worshipping, it's a blessing and a privilege to be amongst this! The worship was stunning and engaging, although did take a little to get into the swing of things, having been worshipping in small Methodist churches for the previous few weeks!

The ministry times were superbly handled, allowing for a freedom for people to worship and be ministered to, whilst dealing with manifestations of the Spirit in a way that would reduce the 'scary' factor for young people in particular who may not have experienced the huge variety of physical, emotional and vocal responses to the Spirit. People are strongly encouraged to pray for those around them, whilst supported by a large, trained prayer team. Anyway, enough of the praises, I have but one small issue!

The final night brought with it a pastor of a church in London, with a strong prophetic and healing ministry. The guy came on stage in a beige coloured suit, with open collared shirt and rather good tan, which, I'm slightly ashamed to say made me concerned due to the steroetype of US TV evangelist! Luckily, he redeemed himself with a strong Brummie accent! What he said was great, and I had no problems with the content, I just again, became concerned when slightly over enthusiastic he would randomly slip into an american accent! I couldn't help but think that this, coupled with the general look, this guy felt that he had to fit into a model that we so often cringe at! Now there is no doubt that God moved that evening, and people were healed and people came to know Jesus as their saviour, and was amazing and phenomenal, but my overriding memories unfotunately will be of this pastor who really needed to immerse himself in the opening words of Romans 12:2!

Please tell me if you have had good experiences of ministers with prophetic and healing ministries, those who've been able to break away from this stereotype! I'd love to be reassured that it is possible!!

Gb
R x

2006-08-16T23:06:00.000Z

So much to write...so little energy!!
Wow...there's loads of stuff I want to blog about so going to have to do it a little bit at a time! So lets start with...The Miracles of Jesus!
This series with Rageh Omaar I'm finding intriguing at the moment! I'm not sure if i'm enjoying it yet though! There seem to be so many issues that as a Theology student i'd like to take issue with, some of the reactions that Jesus has to people and events, even how some of the events are portrayed I find questionable. Let me explain. One of the first things to hit me in the initial episode was the way in which the crowds were portrayed to be hassling, quite violently, for Jesus to feed them, whereas I, and other Christians I've spoken to, agree that Jesus did the feeding of the 5000 miracle as an act of compassion, not because He was pressured into it. Again, I and a friend questioned the thought that Jesus might collapse after raising someone from the dead, from the sheer physical, spiritual and emotional drain of it all.
Now despite the obvious brilliance that, well, at least they are discussing this stuff on relatively primetime TV, and on the whole, not doing too bad a job of it, something that I had been thinking about in the course of my research came to light here. It struck me that really, the things I found most at fault here were those that made me think, "I never imagined it to be quite like that!" I, as many, have been brought up with very traditional sunday school teaching, never really having to think about the nature of Jesus for myself, as i've always been told what it is! So now I would question, to what extent have my experiences and teaching, built up a concept of how I think things would have happened? Yes, maybe most of those are based on good historically based research, but we are creative and imaginative human beings, has my imagination made up for what my brain did not know or learn!?!

Our esteemed Principal at Cliff, Martyn Atkins, in his lectures on Preaching uses the term palimpsest. This is simply where a manuscript or artwork has been written on more than once, therefore the original is obscured, as preachers we must work through the layers of our own perceptions, our congregations perceptions, even history's perceptions, to get down to what the original scripture is trying to tell us. Maybe the same has happened here? My perceptions of how Jesus would look, act and react to situations are to some extent the result of palimpsest, and hence I have this reaction when I see something that doesn't necessarily sit right with me!

Well, the series has yet to finish, and it will be interesting to see the conclusion Rageh Omaar reaches, including considering his upbringing as a Muslim...we shall see!

R x

2006-07-31T17:39:00.000Z

WICKED...SO GOOD!

I have fallen in love with this musical! Wicked is a stunning prequel to the Wizard of Oz, concentrating on the story of the witches. Due to hit the West End in September it comes straight from a very successful run on Broadway.

Composer Stephen Schwartz although a name you may not immediately recognise, has an impressive production list behind him, Godspell, Prince of Egypt, Children of Eden, and lyricist for Pocohontas and Berstein's Mass. There is no doubt whatsoever that this musical is phenomenal, with highly original, passionate and intelligent writing. Having listened to the soundtrack repeatedly, buying the music and singing and playing through it, I am truly convinced that this will be huge in this country and take its place alongside the classic greats of musical theatre. I will be doing my utmost to go and see this show, and hopefully before Christmas in order to see Idina Menzel (the lead in the Broadway production and the voice on the official recording) and so would most definitely heartily encourage others to do so! However, as enthusiastic I may be about the music and production of this stunner, there is something more that intrigues me about this show and its storyline.

Basically, (and not wanting to give too much away, you can find a full synopsis here) this story centres on the captivating, surprising tale of how a misunderstood, green girl named Elphaba becomes 'wicked' but her unlikely friend, Glinda, becomes 'good'. Evangelistically, this show is rich with themes and topics that are begging to be explored. There are issues of self image and social ostracism that run through the plot, but there is so much more than this. As Elphaba sings the song No Good Deed she uses the phrase, "no good deed goes unpunished", as everything she does for the good of others seems to backfire, adding to the public despising of her. Surely there are so many people who have turned their back on 'doing the right thing' for fear that things may turn sour, that they will be unappreciated. There is such a witch hunt mentality, The March of Witch Hunters reminds me so much of the scene of the crowds turning on Jesus.

On his own website Stephen Schwartz says this: "I am on record as saying I do not discuss my own religious background or views. This is because I don't want people's reactions to my shows to be filtered through anything but their own personal beliefs and philosophies. I don't want audiences to react based even partly on the extent to which their own beliefs and backgrounds correspond to my own. This is a long-winded way of saying that I think the work speaks for itself, and the fact that each person brings his or her own point-of-view to it is precisely my goal."

I truly believe that God works through such talented people as this in bringing new ways through which we can explore the realities of society and then relate them to our own faith. The stunning music will simply ensure that many more people will see and talk about this show, and maybe Christians will snap up these opportunities to open conversations, to utilise this wonderful music and lyrics in the sharing of the gospel.

Hmmm...there's s much more I want to say about this show, but think I'm going to have to see it first!

R x

2006-07-25T22:56:00.000Z

MY FIRST TRAVELS AND MAYBE EVEN FIRST REAL CONSIDERATIONS!

Why is it that when you need to do a lot of travelling and you have no air con, the weather is steaming, and at the point when you can have a nice lie down in the garden, the thunder arrives?! Ah well, such is life!

I had a lovely meeting and chat with Rev Brian Hoare yesterday. For those that don't recognise the name, he's Methodist minister, ex-President of Methodist Conference and hymn writer, amongst many other things of course! We discussed my many ideas for my research, and agrees that there was just so much to look at it's incredible.

One of the main issues we raised was that of the extent to which someone can be saved through music. We agreed that as much as we can understand a person gaining an experience of God, and even be brought to a knowledge of God through music, surely, it is not possible to understand the full revelation of the gospel through this. For this to happen there must be greater explanation, this therefore must incorporate lyrics and/or some form of talk. Still this leaves me wondering as to whether the possible spiritual response had during an instrumental, or completely secular concert would lead anyone to a faith in the God that we as Christians believe to be single and true, or would this simply raise an awareness of the spiritual world, unguided, possibly a dangerous and easily misfooted path.

So I guess the question therefore is, musically, what part does music play in the salvation process? Is it merely an aid, or can it really have a greater impact on bringing people into the presence of God? When people hear Handel's Messiah and are made aware of an experience of God, is it because the words of scripture are just so powerful, or the music is so emotive that it moves us to contemplate God, or is it truly a combination of the two?

Hmmm...well...my thoughts are beginning to muddle due to tiredness, but please, comment and let me know what you feel on this topic. I'd be especially interested to hear from anyone who is themselves a musician, and also those for whom music has played a key part in their faith journey (any style and genre, I'm not picky!)

Bless you in your musings,
R x

2006-07-16T23:49:00.000Z

ON BECOMING A LOCAL PREACHER...

I've been told several times this evening that I have now joined the great tradition of preachers...existent for thousands of years...which is all very nice...but don't know that it means much to me yet!

It's been an emotional evening, granted, I cried profusely whilst giving testimony, which I am most mortified at (professionalist streak coming through again!), unfortunately therefore, so did my parents and several of the congregation! Was all way too emotional, but hey...I said what I felt God wanted me to say, who am I to argue!

It almost felt a little trite to me to do the whole... "being a Christian isn't about having an easy life"...spiel...but rather what I wanted to say, and think I did say, was being a Christian doesn't mean we don't really mess up sometimes, and it also doesn't mean that we deal with things and move on, often they stay with us, and we just have to keep giving them over to Him, because they are always going to be an issue for us, whether we like it or not, they are our perceptions of Paul's 'thorn in the flesh'.

A most wonderful and beautiful friend of mine came to see me after the service this evening. She's 7 years younger than me, but we are such good friends! She told me how much she'd always looked up to me from being a young teenager. Part of me thought that maybe I'd let her down by not being the good role-model, but I honestly believe that she respects me more now becuase I am honest with her about my failings. She has seen my not so great nature, and yet still sees what God is doing in me. And my oh my, it's clear that God is doing in her life, and it truly is beautiful!

So, as much as I hardly remember the vows I made, I will remember that God will use our inadequacies as potently as He uses are successes.

R x

2006-07-09T21:26:00.000Z

MAYC actually rocks!!!

I've just got back from Breakout weekend, (national Methodist youth event for those outside the small fortress that is Methodism!!!) I, with a few others, took a group from our circuit, who were, can i say...all absolute gems!!! and to be honest, apart from me agreeing with them that the green and yellow and the oggies, although MAYC heritage are a little too dated and are as good a cheesy Christian stereotype as you'd find on Neighbours, the event, titled 'Passion' went really well! I was loosely involved in the prayer stuff that was happening, but got to go really as a punter for the 1st time in about 6 years!

The young people we took seemed to really enjoy themselves, and I hope got a lot out of it. It's really difficult to tell as i'm not there all the time, but we leadery types managed to have a good heads together about what we can feasably do for the lot that we took, as we are by far the only ones under the age of 40 who are willing and able to do anything with them!

Now I'm by no means a youth worker, I can talk to them, but when it comes down to anything more than that I'd rather that someone who had a specific passion and gift for that age group was hired...but in the mean time...we'll do our best! But what struck me more than anything...was that we were in accomodation with at least 3 or 4 other groups, most of which had leaders in their late 40's at the youngest. Now don't shoot me for being ageist...but these leaders had no control over these guys, we ended up being the disciplinarians for those not even in our group....lads lying across hallways in sleeping bags so that the girls couldn't get to the toilet and the like! And those leaders were more bothered about the fact that they'd been woken up, rather than the welfare of the youths they had brought.

It just struck home to me the extent to which we have to put our youth 1st, in particular in that context. If we don't nurture, teach, discipline, guide and love them, then how will they ever understand the concept of God's nuturing, teaching, disciplining and guiding love???
I know that I am always the 'bad cop' when it comes to disciplining, but I found this weekend that that doesn't have to mean that they hate me!! I always assumed it would, but reasoned discipline seems more to provoke an understanding by those young people that sometimes it's good that they are challenged and that their ideas aren't always complete, and ultimately, I found that we developed more of a mutual respect.

I also spent the weekend telling everyone about my research...so here's hoping and praying that the money issue begins to get resolved!!

Bless u all,
R x

2006-07-06T20:11:00.000Z

Hi people,
completely unrelated blog entry... but... how frustrating is it when you get to your late twenties and realise that you've never really done anything exciting!!?? I'm a fairly predictable person for the most part, i hate it, but i'm predictable! I have the opportunity to go to Hong Kong to see a good friend who works with Jackie Pullinger, experience the worship and rehabilitation community there and be in a place where God works miracles all the time and they are not covered up, hidden or just not talked about but are shared and rejoiced in... and instead of worrying about the cost...i just want to go. I just received a tax rebate for roughly the amount that the flight would be. I have no job (though not for want of trying!), nothing to keep me here, except...as my dear mother keeps reminding me, once that money's gone, I have nothing more to live off! Nothing to pay my phone bill, my car insurance, my petrol...life was so much easier when I had a wage!!!!

This is probably the first time I've ever worried about money, I've always known that God will provide, but now I just think that it's about time that I stopped letting Him do all the hard work and began to do some for myself. And I guess that if God wants me to go to Hong Kong...then I will get there somehow...if not...well then I'll just have to lump it!!

So if anyone has any great ideas about where I can get about £600 for my trip to Hong Kong, and then the next £7000 to pay for my MPhil...please let me know!!!

A financially frustrated Ruth xXx

2006-06-28T22:36:00.000Z

Had an interesting thought provoked by a wonderful friend of mine (you know the sort that you sort of wonder how on earth they got so intuitive...especially when they're at least 4 years your junior!!). I played and sang at an open mic night at college this evening, was very informal, and maybe only 20 people there, but I just did 'Summertime'...nothing too special about that. But...as this friend witnessed...I felt so much more relaxed and comfortable doing this than I seem to when playing worship songs.

Maybe there is something in this, maybe it's reading too much into things, but tonight I could close my eyes and sing and play...and it really didn't matter what happened, I was in my own little world. Now to me, really that's how I'd love my worship to be, in my own little world, with only me and God, but as I wrote last night, it just doesn't happen that way it seems!

Said friend pointed out that this was interesting! I honestly feel that I can worship God as well...if not better by singing something I know and love so well and being able to explore that using the gifts that God has given me, in a style that I truly love. Why does worship have to include words about God? Surely worship is as much about appreciating what he has given...and I think that as much as I play, I know that I would not be able to do so if it were not for my Father's generosity in His abundant blessings to me, therefore, all my music making is worship, as it is all for His glory.

I just wish I was a better pianist!

Ruth x

2006-06-28T07:30:00.000Z

As my lovely Supervisor has given me a heads up on his blog, I think it's only fitting for me to do the same for him! Pete Phillips is the New Testament Tutor and Dean of students at Cliff College, I also teach two of his kids for music theory. Just waiting for the results of a grade 5 theory exam at the moment in fact! I'm not sure who's more nervous, me or him, as it's the first time i've ever entered a pupil for ABRSM exams under my own name rather than a music centre!

2006-06-27T22:01:00.000Z

I led worship this evening at the final celebration of the college year. It really taught me a lot about how lonely a place it can be to be in that kind of leadership role. The challenges of worship leading have been something that has been on my mind a great deal over the past year as I have done more and more of this. I find it difficult to comprehend a time when I haven't played in worship, although really, before I arrived at Cliff College I hardly ever played in my home church as we have an extremely talented organist/pianist, and several others to boot who fill in when he's not around!

As a musician, I'm sure that others of you will agree that there is such an element of professionalism, ruled by perfectionism, that this often becomes a barrier to worship. I have felt this greatly this year and have taken time out in order to concentrate on what my worship is about. I struggle greatly with listening to poor quality bands and worship leading, but have had to come to terms with the fact that worship is less about whether the notes are right, and all about whether our hearts are right. For me, I find that no matter how much I try, I find I am always distracted somehow when playing. Sometimes that is simply by the most beautiful sight in the world...people praising God! However, I believe that God will work in and through me, despite what I say, play, sing or do. In my preparation, I put everything into God's hands, even if it doesn't feel like that when i'm onstage!

This evening has left me very physically, emotionally and spiritually drained. Other circumstances have of course aided this, not least that I had been on the go since 7am, and my organising brain has not stopped all day, and unfortunately, unless I expressely have someone who is capable of calming me down, then I usually get myself into a terrible fluster to the point of wanting to sit down and just cry! But, yet again, I received lovely compliments on the manner in which I led the worship. Again, something with which I struggle...I'd hate it if noone ever told me, but I struggle to receive praise, especially when I can see that things weren't by any means perfect and could have been much better tonight!

The loneliness of the worship leader is trying for someone, for whom company and support is vital. But we play for an audience of one, and I too often forget His pleasure in me using the gifts He so generously chose for me at the conception of time. This sort of leads me on to many other thoughts about music and God. I still can't get to grips with why God invented music, and why it has been such a key feature in Jewish and subsequently Christian worship? Is it for His pleasure or ours, or both? For if it is solely for His pleasure and purposes, does he delight as much in the music performed so beautifully by an atheist virtuoso as much as He delights in the worship song badly picked out on by the piano by the Christian, desperate to be able to play music to honour and worship God.

Some more thoughts...maybe the Holy Spirit is allowed more freedom to move in a tired brain!!

blessings to all, always,

Ruth x

2006-06-25T21:26:00.001Z

So, back from mission in Dagenham. I've met some wonderful people and seen that there are still struggling churches that haven't given up yet, and are still willing to make a change despite their average age being well in a pensionable bracket!

So some more thoughts on God and music. Something that has intrigued me... when Bach and some other contemporaries wrote their music, the headed each piece 'AMDG' - Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam...'to the greater glory of God'. What impact does that now have on the contemporary performer and audience? If such a devoted spirituality can write such beautiful music, is there an element of the spiritual in the response of those performing and listening, even in the most secular of settings?

This also raises the question of an audiences' response to what they hear. Is it all to easy to confuse a spiritual repsonse with an emotional one, or to what extent is there a crossover?

I'll let you ponder!

2006-06-16T11:19:00.000Z

Welcome to my blog...this is merely the beginning, so please excuse the lack of anything much interesting to read, but please return in a couple of weeks to see what I've been up to and maybe had a few musings on my research area for next year's MPhil!

Am off now to Dagenham on mission with Cliff College (where I currently study and will be continuing with an MPhil course in September!)

Please feel free to leave any initial thoughts on the subject of music, theology and evangelism. I'm musing on the nature of music at the moment, what did God create it for...and how does God see music? We treat it as a great gift from our Father so how can we utilise it (in most if not all genres) to speak to others about the nature of Him.

God bless you in your thinking and experiences x